PHOTOS BY GRANT JONES
Bartenders come in all shapes and sizes, and from all walks of life. Who’s to say who is best equipped to give you what you need when you sit down across the bar? Bartenders. Professional babysitters, part-time psychologists, and a drunk’s best friend. When you need to know the best spots to get your drink on around campus and who to chat up while you’re there, we’ve got you.
How did you get into bartending and how long have you been doing it?
I started at Fourth Street serving, but I always made it clear that my interest was bartending. So about a year ago, I started training and I’ve been bartending here since.
What’s the craziest thing you’ve seen while bartending?
I think we see crazy things almost every night and it’s hard to choose just one thing that I actually want people to read about this place, but what’s sticking out to me is a few months ago when this guy was in here, so drunk he could hardly walk, and he waddled into our walk-in freezer thinking it was the bathroom and whipped his d*ck out like he was about to pee in there. Thankfully security got him out before he could.
What’s the worst way for someone to get your attention at the counter?
Snapping, clapping, “Hey you!”, “Excuse me?”, whistling, waving your card around. We are not dogs so do not call us like dogs. We see you, we know you’re there, just wait your turn. Everyone else at the bar is equally as important as you are.
What’s the best?
Literally just stand at the bar and hang out. Making eye contact with a bartender could help you, and you can have your card out or like your hand out signaling that you need help, but again, don’t wave it around or anything. I mean come on, that’s obnoxious.
What’s the most overplayed song at the bar?
Currently: Lizzo, especially during karaoke. Like we stan, but I’m over hearing her 10+ times a night. All time: Mo bamba. If I had a dollar for every time I heard this song at work I wouldn’t need a job.
What’s your go-to cocktail lately? Go-to beer?
Recently I’ve been making myself double Tito’s with sprite, sour mix, and strawberry purée. It tastes super good and it’s cute because it’s pink. My forever go-to beer is actually a cider, I’m obsessed with anything DownEast makes.
When you’re not bartending, what are you doing?
Normal life things like laundry and cleaning my house. Gotta find time to do it somewhere, ya know?
When you’re not here, what bars do you like to go to?
Out-R-Inn, Standard, Food Hall, basic popular places. But my favorite place to drink will always be my own couch.
If you could grab a drink with anyone–dead or alive–who would it be and what would you drink?
The ladies from Sex in the City. I feel like we’d just really hit it off. Obviously I’m drinking something like a martini.
Finish this sentence: Fourth Street is the best bar on campus because…
It’s not just a campus bar. We see all kinds of different people and we’re a super fun and welcoming staff. We’re really close to the Crew stadium so we get crazy soccer fans, there’s some clubs and sports teams that we lovingly call our regulars, a group of teachers have a weekly happy hour here––any person can come here and find a day that’s perfect for them.