1870 Mag

Twinkie Bar Crawl

Bars that somehow survived the apocalypse.

While Ohio State is still mourning the loss of a handful of campus bars, there are a few near the perimeters that have somehow withstood the bar apocalypse. These places are much older than the High Street favorites that left us, and they go overwhelmingly unnoticed. Get away from the shoulder-to-shoulder Beat the Clock experience and go back to the bars of your parents’ time, complete with decades of writing on the walls, and ash trays on the patio tables.

Remember all the High Street locations that you didn’t know were vacant until you tried to open the door and noticed the cobwebs? (R.I.P. the record store, the frozen yogurt place, and the grilled cheese place that all used to exist on High St). The bars I’m about to outline for you are those exact buildings you definitely looked at once and thought, “Sigh, it’s probably vacant and left sitting there like all the rest”. We were wrong. These places are still thriving and highly available to students.

If you’re looking for an actual dive bar and not one that was rebranded to have a dive bar atmosphere, check out this list I like to call the “Twinkie Bar Crawl” (because no one knows how those things stay fresh for so long).

Ruby Tuesday

Best Night To Go: Tuesday or Wednesday

Found on: East-Central Campus

This bar founded way back in 1973 is “a block and a world away from High Street.” Located on 18th Ave and Summit St, Ruby Tuesday is the chill after-class spot for a homeworkless Thursday evening. They have $1 pizzas (like, the entire pizza) from 5 p.m. to 6 p.m. Monday through Friday. You can even throw in a pitcher of beer for another $6. Ruby Tuesday is a dark, expansive bar with pool tables and Family Guy playing almost 24/7 (outside of game day, of course). They offer new twists on your classic weekday bar specials, like Rubesday (Tuesday) Smash Bros Melee and Wednesday Trivioke, where if your team gets a trivia question wrong, the other team picks a song for you to karaoke. The couch-potato dude vibes were almost enough to turn me away, plus the cavern-like basement that makes you question if you really did find the restroom, but the cheap pizza and beer is enough to keep me coming back a couple times a month. If you live far off-campus in the east and rely on Fourth Street, Two Bucks, and Mamacitas to keep your liver failing, add Ruby Tuesday to the list. Trust me, you won’t regret it.

Bier Stube

Best Night To Go: Game Day

Found on: South Campus

Ever notice that little green and white building across from Chumley’s that looks like an old pizza shop? That’s Bier Stube. Another ashtray-friendly bar with more writing on the walls than all the Too’s booths combined (now found at Leo’s, F.Y.I) and well-stocked with alcohol branded decor on the walls. This simple, gets-the-job-done bar has a meager but mighty five beers on tap, many more in cans and bottles, $1 wells Monday-Friday 3 p.m. to 7 p.m., and a selection of pizzas, subs, garlic sticks, and hot dogs. After visiting these bars, I’m now confident that I don’t want to be at a bar that doesn’t offer me food. It’s easy to make friends here if you’re into a kicked-back setting and enjoy talking to strangers. Not to mention, “the shots are bananas,” says alumnae Lauren Miller who I ran into on gameday. Bier Stube isn’t popular with the undergrads, but the real adults in the area love this place and consider it their spot, even if they’re out-of-towners who only come in on game days to reconnect. Lauren was even surprised I knew how to find Bier Stube as I sat there beer-in-hand like I frequented it. This is a great bar to mix up your usual weekend set if south campus is where you reside.

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The Thirsty Scholar

Best Night To Go: Thursday or Friday

Found on: West Campus

Going back to my point about bars that also feed me, the Thirsty Scholar frequently offers free food of varying types on game days! Follow them on Twitter for regular updates on when that’ll happen: @ThirstyScholar. This is another bar I straight-up always thought was an old house or an abandoned restaurant located behind the Go-Co gas station on Lane Ave. This bar is still alive-and-well, hosting Trivia on Thursdays and Mug Nights on Thursdays and Fridays ($5 for your first mug, $2.25 for refills). Living on north-west campus can seem far away from the more densely populated mid-campus bars, but you’re in a sweet spot for classics, this bar being one of them. Being the bar easily the closest to the stadium, prioritize this one over anything else on cold game days you want to drink as much as you can before finding your seat. The Thirsty Scholar is another great bar to keep up with Buckeye alumni on Ohio State’s game days, because you’ll find plenty of them at this spot, too.

The Library

Best Night To Go: Wednesday

Found on: North Campus

This bar is by far the easiest to locate, and one you may have already been to before. Found on north campus by Chop Shop across from the CVS, The Library is the most classic dive-bar-esque of the four in this article. The lighting is low but warm, not dark. The tables are the perfect distance across from whoever you’re sitting with and all the booths make your personal circle of friends seem cozier and closer than ever. This bar is one you’ll want to escape into when the weather gets chilly. There’s even a couple of lit-up old arcade games contributing to the home-y glow. With Wednesday Mug Nights and $1 wells all week, this bar is the ideal spot after a long day where you just need a cheap drink, free entertainment, and good company. You can even avoid public criticism for going to a bar on a weeknight by casually mentioning to your classmates, “I’m going to The Library tonight.”

Feature photo by Robert Berry.

Madi Task

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