1870 Mag

Five People That Would Be Worse Commencement Speakers Than Abigail Wexner

Word is out, Abigail Wexner is our 2017 commencement speaker, and some students are less than thrilled. Although Twitter is blowing up with tweets such as:

…it could be a lot worse.

  1. The POTUS

Although Obama graced our presence on graduation day of 2013, the majority of graduates would be less than thrilled if Donald Trump came to send us off into the world of post-grad.

2. The Person Behind the Oscars Mix Up

Imagine Fred Berger saying, “you failed, by the way.” We want to avoid any mix ups this grad season, so lets steer clear of whoever mixed up the envelopes.

3. Steve Harvey

Remember when he accidentally crowned the wrong Miss Universe? Sorry Steve, we love you on Family Feud, but you can’t take away our crowns.

4. Danielle Peskowitz Bregoli

Does “cash me outside, how bow dah” ring a bell? Danielle, you can cash us outside of the Shoe after commencement.

5. He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named

We may less than thrilled, but imagine the Dark Lord speaking to a stadium of muggles, without Harry Potter to save us. You-Know-Who shall not be named as our commencement speaker.

See? It could get a lot worse than Abigail Wexner. Pop open some bubbly and enjoy the day, regardless of who will be speaking.

Colleen Fortney

Colleen Fortney



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