1870 Mag

Defend Your Home: Trash Talking Minnesota

The Buckeye Standup Comedy Club dishes out some trash talking tips for OSU’s home games.

We as Ohio State fans are known for a few things: winning games, drinking beer, and trash talking the opposing team. Iconic moments in Ohio State trash talking history like when Marcus Hall flipped the bird to the entire Michigan stadium come to mind, and keeping traditions alive is something we must do as fans. No, we can’t get on the field and let the opposing team know your feelings towards them, but we sure as hell can yell it at the fans in the stands.

The Buckeye Standup Comedy Club is no newcomer when it comes to cracking jokes and they don’t shy away when football season rolls around. There’s tons of ways to laugh about these teams. Take our little brother, Michigan, for example. Their head coach eats boogers, probably wears khakis to bed, and is afraid of chickens. But, do we really need to trash talk Michigan? We’ve been handing them L’s on the field for who knows how long now.

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As for the rest of the teams OSU faces this year? They are open and free game. With a few fun facts about each university and state, here’s how the BSCC is talkin’ trash to OSU’s unfortunate opponents this year.

Minnesota Golden Gophers

Fun facts about Minnesota

  1. Minnesota produces more turkeys each year than there are people in the state of California.
  2. There are more white-tailed deer in Minnesota than there are college students.
  3. Minnesota has thousands of lakes in or around the state making for a large mosquito problem. Fake tourism websites for Minnesota go as far to say “Save A Minnesotans, Eat A Mosquito” and “Minnesota: 10,000 Lakes and 10,000,000,000 Mosquitos!”
  4. Another fake slogan: “There Are Only 3 Things You Can Grow in Minnesota: Colder, Older, & Fatter”
  5. Since 1982, Ohio State has not lost a game to Minnesota. Currently the Buckeyes are on a 9-game win streak.

Minnesota more like Minne-”so dumb!” — Harrison Biederman

Did you know that winter lasts 3 times longer in Minnesota?— Joseph Grunenwald

The closest thing to a decent football player to ever come out of Minnesota was that Prince hologram at the Super Bowl. — Zack White

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Want more trash talking tips for Ohio State’s home games this season? Check out our other guides!

Defend Your Home: Rutgers

Defend Your Home: Tulane

Defend Your Home: Nebraska

Defend Your Home: Indiana

Feature photo by David Heasley.

1870 Staff

1870 Staff

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The girl at bulls Friday night who said I can’t handle all of her, I’d like to give it a shot

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not the draining of mirror lake

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