I had sexual relations with my roommate’s mom last weekend and I feel bad every time I see my roommate. What do I do?
From, Deviant David
Dear Deviant David,
Holy shit dude, you slept with your roommate’s mom? Or just had “sexual encounters”? That is like every college student soap opera and low-key dream. However, if you do feel bad every time that you see your roommate, you should tell him/her. After all, you banged their mom, that’s wild. If the mom is married, you messed up even more and definitely need to fess up. Good news is that I don’t think you will be blamed for it since being a mom usually doesn’t involve banging your child’s roommate. Telling them will be weird since now you have both been inside of their mom, but it’ll get less weird as the year progresses. If you can wait it out, I would refrain from telling them until right before Thanksgiving. Yes, it screws the mom over a little bit, but it gives them time to cool down before seeing you again and allows them time to discuss it over with their mom so it isn’t as weird for you.
Or, if they are not a friend and just a roommate and the mom isn’t married, maybe don’t tell them. After all, what happens in the privacy of their mom’s bedroom is her business. And I am sure they could live the rest of their life happy as can be without knowing this information. But, if you got to get it off of your chest, we don’t blame you. Just be sure to keep your toothbrush in a safe, hidden space.
I hope that helps…try to bang fewer moms next time or at least wait until you move out. This will make a great story for your kid someday (or in 9 months, depending on what happened with the mom).
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